Caught Off Guard
by Elmrada
Summary: Four years has passed since Zidane stayed back at the Iifa Tree. He returns to Alexandria after a long journey, but instead of appearing in the I Want to be Your Canary encore presented by Tantalus, Zidane comes to Steiner's doorstep asking to be a Knight of Pluto. He says it isn't safe for Dagger to know of his return. Will Zidane be able to remain hidden from the Queen?
1. Chapter 1

Caught Off Guard

Chapter One

"Zidane?" It swirled through his mind, making him squeeze his eyes shut tighter. "Zidane? Is that you?" _Yes it's me. _Zidane wanted to answer but he couldn't lift his eyelids. They were so heavy after months of endless travel with little sleep. "Zidane, come on, get up." He was nudged now. He let out a long moan and swatted at whoever was bumping and bothering him. Didn't he deserve a little sleep? Could he not get a break? "ZIDANE!" The scream made his eyes fly open. He shot up on the small garden bench he was dozing on. He rubbed the back of his neck and turned to see Adelbert Steiner, Captain of the Knights of Pluto, standing beside the bench. He looked rather aged. He had the beginning of crows nest at the corner of his chocolate eyes. Steiner also looked slightly smaller than the last time Zidane saw him.

Which was close to three and a half years ago.

"Rusty, hey." Zidane said, leaping from the bench and stretching his arms to the sky. He then scratched his lower back. "Good to see you again." Steiner's eyes were wide open, like he was looking at ghost. "Why're you lookin' at me like that?" Zidane's brow furrowed together.

"Zidane, I thought you were dead." Steiner stated simply. "We all did."

"I'm not that easy to get rid of." Zidane joked, letting off a roll of the shoulders.

"We... we held a memorial and everything after you didn't return the first year."

"Is that so?" Zidane asked, cocking an eyebrow up. "Well, looks like I rose from the dead, Rusty. How long has it been anyway?"

"Close to four years..." Steiner shook his head.

"You been keepin' track?" Zidane worked on popping his back.

"Of coruse. Your Majesty seems to be more miserable everyday." Steiner replied.

The mention of the Queen brought softness to Zidane's face. Dagger. He could remember her shimmering brown hair and matching eyes. Her soft, plush looking lips that he wanted to so badly claim. Her curvy body that was complimented by whatever she wore. Her voice. That's what Zidane missed the most. The way she sang the song of her people. The song he listened to her sing so much, he'd learned it. And he sang it to himself when he was alone and blue. It was that very song that got him back to where he was standing now. Before Steiner who looked so shocked, but oddly happy, to see Zidane's well-being standing before him. He missed Dagger. The girl who tired so hard to fit in with common folk. That was so brave as to stand before Bahumaut in her sturdy castle moments before it exploded. Dagger. That was something his life was missing.

"I shall notify her of your return!" Steiner declared, rounding Zidane for the castle.

"Wait!" Zidane grabbed Steiner's arm, surprising the Captain. "Don't."

"What? Why?"

"Steiner, I can't."

"You can't what?"

"I can't see her."

"Why not?" Steiner turned back to Zidane, confusion etched across his face. "The very mention of her name used to get you riled up."

"And that hasn't changed." Zidane shook his head, rubbing his hand through his messy blond hair, "Dagger can't know I'm here."

"What's going on?" Steiner placed his hands on his hips.

"I can't tell you. It's for her safety though, Steiner." Zidane told him, "I want what's best for her. You know that. It's just... not safe for me to see her right now. Kuja..." His voice trailed off and suddenly Steiner understood.

"I see..." Steiner sighed, saluting crisply for no reason but to show respect. "Shall I alert the others of your arrival?"

"No." Zidane shook his head, "Word will get around to her eventually. The group still talks... don't they?" Steiner nodded.

"Yes. We have a reunion anually to catch up. And members show up from time to time at the castle and to pay respects to your... ahem... memorial." He scratched the back of his head sheepishly.

"You're the only one who can know I'm here." Zidane told him. "Nobody else. Not even Beatrix, alright? We have to keep it low until I know it's absolutely safe."

"When will it be safe?" Steiner asked. Zidane's face grew dark and he lowered his head. "Zidane?"

"I don't know..." Zidane admitted, "It may never be safe again... but I'm willing to remain dead if that turns out to be the case." Steiner's face looked completely shocked, "Don't look at me like that!" Zidane growled, throwing a kick at the bench he was snoozing on previously. It turned skew from the original position it was in. "I don't want to be invisible from the group, Rusty! I really don't! I want to be with Dagger." His face softened just thinking about her, "I want to tell her... I love her."

"And I'm sure Your Majesty still loves you." Steiner said, "She visits your memorial everyday and asks to be alone while doing so. She doesn't let anybody escort her there and from." Zidane was touched to hear this, "She's never gotten over you Zidane. And to be honest, I'm not sure she ever will." There was a silence between the two. "Zidane, where will you go?"

"That's why I'm here, actually." Zidane turned to him. "I've barely been in Alexandria for six hours. I've been travelling here for years, trying to get 're the only one who knows I'm here." Zidane explained, "I was hoping you could help me."

"Well what do you inquire?" Steiner asked, cocking an eyebrow up.

"I want to be a Knight of Pluto." Zidane said to Steiner's shock.

"You... you _what_?" Steiner stuttered, his mouth going dry.

"I know, crazy. I'm not really soldier material." Zidane held his hands up. "But if you put me on the Knights of Pluto, I can keep an eye on Dagger and get a chance to see the team when they come by." Steiner still looked doubtful, "Steiner _please._" Zidane said, biting his lip, "You don't know how much this would help."

"Well..." Steiner lowered his eyes to the cobblestone. His steeled toe shoe played with a stray ivy leaf vine on the path. "I guess having a new recruit wouldn't be so bad." Steiner now looked up at the anxious blond. "I could teach you all about being a Knight of Pluto." Zidane nodded, "Fine."

"Gee, thanks! You don't know how..."

"Wait." Steiner held his hand up, "You still have to go through the application work to become a Knight of Pluto."

"What? Why?"

"They are reviewed by Your Majesty personally. She likes to know who are her guards. It will look suspcious if I just grant you entry. We can fill a fake one out." He gestured over his shoulder at the small shed on the edge of the Alexandria Castle property. "This is my barracks where you can fill the paper work out. The Knights of Pluto barracks are opposite of mine." He gestured down the path to reveal a slightly bigger stone building, matching the colour of the castle. "Come with me."

...

"Good afternoon, Your Majesty." Beatrix saluted crisply to the Queen sitting at the small garden table with her tea. "Is your tea alright?"

"Yes, of course." Dagger smiled her perfect smile at the General. "Please, join me."

"Oh no. That would be irresponsible of me." Beatrix declined modestly.

"Nonsense." Dagger shook her head. "Please. Sit." She gestured to the empty table across from her. Dagger was wearing her hair in a fishtail braid down her back, where it reached her waist. As the years passed she took to wearing a short sleeve button up blouse tucked into a orange skirt that stopped at in the middle of thighs, giving it a rather mini-skirt appeal. She also wore black leather boots with a three inch heel that came up below her knee. To say briefly, the years had been good to Dagger, though she thought she lost the love of her life. Each day though, the Queen seemed to get prettier. At nineteen years old, she was a beauty for the whole world to feast upon. Though the years without Zidane did cause her to lose her common folk talk. She had reverted back to her polite royalty speech, which she was sure Zidane would be disappointed with.

Beatrix let out a soft sigh and seated herself gently into the chair. She poured herself a nice piping cup of coffee in the bone white china glass. She set it on the saucer and pulled it up to her. She then smiled up at Dagger, who was sitting perfectly errect across from her. Beatrix knew that Dagger grew bored and sometimes lonely just being around the castle. The occasional grand ball swept through, occupying the pretty girl for a few weeks while she made the appropriate arrangements. But once it was gone, she had nothing to do. No one to truly talk to. Dagger rose with the sun every morning, as she did when she travelled with Zidane. She would finish all her duties on her agenda for the day by noon. And then at one she left for alone time at Zidane's memorial sight. Beatrix had brought up the idea perhaps matching her with someone new to help with ruling the country and to maybe ease her ill heart, but Dagger would hear nothing of it. She was stuck on Zidane.

"What has been recent?" Dagger asked with a small smile, sipping her tea.

"I've written up a new patrol schedule and chart for my girls." Beatrix replied, lifting her cup to her lips. After taking a drink, she set it down as quietly as she could. "I'm sure this one will be much more efficent than the one Steiner had completed a few months ago."

"I am assuming you have had trouble with Steiner's schedule?"

Beatrix let out a low chuckle, "Several problems. Writing schedules is not the man's high point."

"But he has his high points." Dagger replied, good naturedly.

"Well, absolutely." Beatrix agreed. "He's a great lover." Dagger only nodded to this and Beatrix instantly regret that example. "I mean... er... I apologize, Your Majesty." Dagger simply dismissed the thought with a wave of her hands.

"You enjoy happiness just like everybody else." Dagger told her, "Just because mine ended tragically doesn't mean anything." A silence passed between the two. Dagger suddenly found the rosebush near by to the most interesting thing in the world.

"Forgive me, Your Majesty, but... will you ever get over him?"

Dagger's gaze slowly fell onto the general across from her. Her eyes were glossy. She pulled a lacy hankerchief from the back of her skirt and dabbed delicately under her eyes. She then smiled, despite the broken look in her eyes. She shrugged and with a strained voice said, "I don't know."

...

"Here is the application." Steiner slid the peice of paper across the table with a quill and ink "Fill out what you'd like your double identity to be." Zidane nodded, glancing around the room momentarily. The Captains barrack wasn't that impressive. There was a small kitchen with a table for two against the small window that had a not-too-great view of an overgrown and most likely forgotten bush outside. It then led to a small living area. It had a loveseat, some plants that Steiner didn't keep up with well, and a desk at which he was seated at. There was an open door that allowed Zidane to see into the tiny bedroom Steiner had. It had a bed with bland sheets in the corner, a small closet, a nightstand that had a clock ticking on it, and a full body mirror in the opposing corner.

Zidane looked down at the application and took in a deep breath. "Name... how does Zell Boswell sound?" Zidane looked up at Steiner who pondered over it. He eventually nodded, "Alright. Just call me Zell from now on." Zidane scribbled the name across the line. "I am twenty years old..." Zidane mumbled, continuing to fill all the paper work out. "Hair colour... brown. Eye colour... blue..." Zidane continued.

"Wait." Steiner leaned over his shoulder, "Brown?"

"We'll colour it tonight." Zidane said, "I can't make it match too much to my description." Zidane explained to him, "She'll get suspcious."

"...Okay." Steiner replied after a moment.

"Here you go, Steiner." Zidane held the application out to them.

"After you hand me this, you're a Knight of Pluto, Zidane," Steiner warned, "Are you sure what this is what you want to do?"

"It's what I have to do, Steiner." Zidane told him with a shake of his head, "Take it. Please." Steiner sighed and took the application into his hand, reviewing it one final time, before he placed it in a messenger back on a hook by the door.

"Let me get your gear." Steiner disappeared into his bedroom and then returned. "Come on, let's make sure it all fits." Steiner held the torso piece out to Zidane. He slid out of vest and into his white shirt. He pulled the armor on. It fit perfectly. Along with the pants and shoes. "Here's your helmet." Zidane frowned at the idea. "If you're going to hide from Your Majesty, you must hide your face."

"I know, I know." Zidane agreed and slid it over his head. It hid his face fine with the new steel plates that had been installed into the new and improved helmets, curtesy of Squad Beatrix. "You don't think she'll be able to regonize me?" Steiner shook his head.

"You can barely see your eyes." Steiner replied, "We'll colour your hair soon and be sure your tail stays in the armor, alright, Zidane?" Zidane cleared his throat from behind the helmet, "I mean, Zell."

"Will do, Cap'n." Zidane saluted as best as he knew.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

When Zidane entered the Knights of Pluto barrack, the smell made him think of sweat and depression. When you first walked in there was a decent sized living area complete with three matching couches that faced a fire place that had a cackling fire and decent sized caualdron hanging over it. To the right was eating room. A long boring brown table spread down it with benchs lining up along with it. Food and cups were left splayed all over the table and some small cabinets containing food lined against the wall. To the right was where they slept. Nine beds jutted out from the wall, each with a chest at the end of it. Each bed had something personal on it, except the one at the very end. He was assuming that was his bed. When Zidane entered, the Knights of Pluto were all there, either relaxing on the couches or chatting and eating at the table. They looked shocked to see another person.

They were all in retired clothing, their armour folded atop the chests by the beds. Quickly, all of the soldiers jumped to their feet and followed Zidane as he made his way to his bed. He put his backpack on the bed and then turned to the men. He felt weird, being the only one in his armour, but for a moment he panicked. Would they guys remember what he looked like. Two men pushed to the front of the crowd.

"Welcome, Soldier." One saluted, "I'm Haagen. I'm kind of incharge with Captain Steiner."

"Me as well," The other saluted, "I'm Weimar." He then chuckled, "If you want to get with any of the gals from Squad Beatrix, I'm your man." Zidane only nodded slowly.

"He strikes out easily," Haagen rolled his eyes, "Anyway, we're on the break for the rest of the day, Soldier. Why don't you take your armour off?" Zidane stood still for a moment. "Oh yeah, what's your name?"

"Zell," Zidane replied. Then he cleared his throat, "Zell Boswell."

"Well, Zell." Haagen smiled, "Welcome aboard." Slowly Zidane's hands came up to his helmets. He took in a deep breath and slid the helmet out. His brown hair toppled out. Steiner made Zidane cut his hair. He had lost the pony tail and it had been trimmed up to a boyish layer. He fingered through it for a moment. Haagen and Weimar stepped aside for the rest of the soldiers. Zidane was assuming nobody regonized him. He began working out of his armour and into his matching rest uniform as the other soldiers, which was a white T-shirt tucked into airship cargo pants.

"Yo, I'm Blutzen." A man said. He had shaggy blond hair and Zidane remembered him as one of the guys him and Blank jumped to take armour from. "Welcome to Hell. Terrible hours and you barely get to see the beauty of Alexandria Castle."

"What do you mean?" Zidane asked, folding his armour atop his chest.

"The Queen of course," Blutzen replied, making Zidane freeze up a little. "We rarely get to see her. You're the new guy, so she'll probably schedule an appointment with you to welcome you to Alexandria. You're lucky. She's a beauty. Any guy would be lucky to have that gal, but she's too hung up on some guy who died years ago."

"I see." Zidane nodded, digging in his backpack for things he may want to put in his secure chest. Of course he came across his citizenship papers that read Zidane Tribal. Quickly he tossed all of his real identity papers in the chest as another guard came up. He was the second victim of him and Blank years ago.

"Hey, man. I'm Kohel." He greeted. "What brought you to the Knights of Pluto?"

"Um." Zidane rubbed the back of his neck, "My, erm, family lived in Lindblum as travelling merchants. My parents and, uh, brother were killed on the job. So I decided to make myself useful." Zidane explained as smoothly as possible.

"Geez, that's rough." Kohel crossed his arms over his chest and dug the toe of his shoe into the ground, "I only came here because my father sent me here. He thought I needed some straightening out. Guess I just never got around to leaving. I kind of like it here." Zidane smiled in response. The next guard seemed to have the bed next to Zidane. He was busy scribbling away on a piece of parchment.

"Oh, hi." He said, a little flustered. "I'm Laudo. I don't belong here."

"Then why are you here?" Zidane asked, cocking an eyebrow up.

"I orginally came here seeking to be a scholar. However, I ended up on the Knights of Pluto." Laudo shook his head and sighed, "I want to be a writer. I write great stories. You should read them someday."

"Sure." Zidane nodded, not sure if he was going to like Laudo, who was hugging parchment to his chest, daydreaming of what could be. "What're they about?"

"Fairies! Trolls! Unicorns! Oh the unicorns!" He giggled like a school girl and continued writing. Zidane nodded again.

"Right." He said, setting his backpack down beside his bed. Zidane went into the living area, just in time to help catch the rack of swords that were plummeting down to a soldier with knocky knees. He was shaking as Zidane caught all of it. "Hey, you alright?"

"Y...yes." He replied, rubbing his hair through his spiky brown hair. "Th... thanks, Zell." He stuttered uselessly, still shaking in his boots. "Hi. I'm Dojebon. I work with the weapons."

"I see." Zidane said, not sure if this guy was soldier material. "But are you okay?"

"Yeah..." Dojebon nodded, checking the swords. "I just have panic attacks sometimes." He explained, "I was traumatized as a child and sometimes I just can't control myself. It can really get in the way with certain things, but... I manage." He put a smile on his face.

"What traumatized you so bad?" Zidane asked, crossing his arms over his chest. A look panic crossed Dojebon's face again however, "Forget I asked." Zidane placed his hand on his shoulder, "Sorry man. That was kind of rude of me."

"Don't think too much of it." A soldier said, looking over the back of the couch. "I'm Breireicht." Zidane crossed to him, "He won't tell anyone what it is. I'm the only one who knows."

"And you won't tell anyone?" Zidane asked, leaning against the couch.

"Nope. I'm the greatest secret keeper." Breieicht replied with a grin. "Welcome aboard, Zell. If you need anyone to talk to, just let me know." Zidane nodded.

"Thanks. I'll keep that in mind."

"Got any dark secrets?"

"What?" Zidane's brow knitted together. "No."

"Sure you do. Everyone does."

Zidane bit his lip and looked away, "Yeah, you're right. But I can't tell you."

"You'll warm up to me eventually." Breireicht laughed.

Zidane walked into the eating area to see Haagen and Weimar chatting. Sitting by his lonesome was a soldier he hadn't spoken to yet. He was chowing down on some bread and cheese. He waved Zidane over. "Hi, I'm Mullenkedheim! You hungry?"

"Not really, thanks though. I'm Zell."

"Not hungry? How can you not be hungry? I'm ALWAYS hungry."

"I see..." Zidane nodded. He then strolled away. And went back to his bed. He threw himself on to and listened to Laudo's whisperings about his weird fantasy story. He sighed and put his hands under his head and thought about Dagger. He thought about what Blutzen said. How she liked to have a talk with the new soldiers. "I'll get to see Dagger..." He muttered, closing his eyes.

...

"Your Majesty," Steiner entered the throne room to see Dagger sitting errect in it. "I have the application for the newest Knights of Pluto recruit." Beatrix cocked an eyebrow up from her position in the room. Dagger stood, her leather boots echoing in the large marble room. "Oh, Your Majesty, you needn't get up."

"Silly, I can meet you half way." Dagger smiled, dismissing his concern. "I'm perfectly capable." She took the application from his hand. "Zell Boswell." Beatrix now peaked over Dagger's shoulder, her brow furrowed together. It made Steiner slightly nervous. His girlfriend was a smart one and he could tell she was peicing it all together. Not that Dagger wasn't a smart one, she just hadn't seen enough applications to know which ones were fake and which were true. "Well after I come back from Zidane's memorial, I'd like a meeting with Mr. Zell Boswell." Dagger smiled, handing the application back. "Now if you two would excuse me." Dagger rounded the Captain and General and made her leave. Once Beatrix knew it was safe, she turned on her boyfriend.

"Steiner, who are you fooling?" She asked with a knitted brow.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Steiner shrugged.

Beatrix glanced over at two of her guards standing by the door, "Girls, you are dismissed for rounds." They saluted and left, "Adelbert Steiner, you better tell me who you're sneaking into the guards now." She put her hands on her hip, "You do not want to face the wrath of me." She was right. Steiner had faced it before.

"Just follow me." Steiner replied.

...

"Zell, the Cap'n needs to talk to you." Haagen said, leaning into the bedroom area. Zidane lifted his head from lying down. He pulled into his armour quickly, smashing his helmet over his head. "He's waiting for you outside the door." Haagen told him. Zidane thanked him and hurried out the door. When he saw Beatrix with Steiner, he saulted.

"Yes, Captain?" Zidane said, lowering his voice slightly, "Zell Boswell reporting for duty." Steiner sighed.

"Cut the act and follow us to my barracks." Once they were at Steiner's barracks, he was told to remove his helmet.

"What the hell, Steiner! It was supposed to be a secret between you and I!" Zidane ripped his helmet off, running it through his light and messy layers.

"Zidane, what happened to your hair?!" Beatrix gasped, running her hand through it.

"Steiner and I coloured it." Zidane told her, setting the helmet on the desk. "Beatrix, how'd you figure out it was me?" Beatrix rolled her eyes.

"Are you guys kidding me? Sure you fooled Your Majesty, but you won't so easily sneak through the General of Squad Beatrix." Beatrix confidently said, flipping one of her curls over her shoulders. "Zidane, I thought you were dead."

"Yeah, join the club." Steiner mumbled.

"I never died." Zidane told them, "Don't you people think it'd take a few years to get back from another continent by foot?" Beatrix and Steiner exchanged looks. "And I was also in a coma for a few months." Zidane shrugged.

"What?!" Beatrix cried.

"I woke up in Conde Petie. A little goblin town just over the moutain range from the Iifa Tree. They took care of me because I was in a coma for eight months. And then they trained me back to strength. It took about two years to even get on with my journey back here." Zidane explained.

"Why can't Your Majesty know about you being here?" Beatrix asked.

"I don't think it's safe for her to know." Zidane said.

"Why?"

"Kuja." Was all Zidane said before Beatrix understood.

"I see... will it ever be safe?"

"I hope so." Zidane replied, putting his hands in his pockets. "I want to be with her."

"She misses you so much, Zidane." Beatrix told him, still shocked to see him as brunette, "When she comes back from your memorial, she'll want to talk to you. Just wait until you've seen how much she has changed." Zidane took in a deep breath, "Yeah you may want to hold that. When you see her, she'll take your breath away."

...

Zidane stood outside the throne room, his helmet tucked under his arm. Beatrix and Steiner gave him a thumbs up. Nobody else was in the throne room. It was just Dagger. He let out uneven breath and slid his helmet over his head. After ruffling the little bit of brown hair that came out from under the helmet, he pushed the doors to the throne room open, and quickly shut them after him. And suddenly, it felt like someone had knocked the air out of him.

There was Dagger sitting in the throne, her feet crossed at the ankle. Her button down blouse tucked into an orange mini skirt that attracted him ten times more to her. She had sexy leather boots that ran up her legs just below her knees. And the fishtail braiding just added to the beauty. She stood and walked down the few steps. Zidane quickly moved across. She held her hand out to him. He wiped his hand on his pant legs and brought his hand up. Her hands were still as soft as he remembered.

"Hello, Zell." She said to his disappointment. He was just a stranger. Everything they ever had was gone. And it wasn't only gone because of some hunk of metal on his head. "I hear you are the new recruit to the fine Knights of Pluto. Welcome. May I ask why you joined the Knights of Pluto, Mr. Boswell?"

"Please," Zidane brought his hands up, using a husky voice as Zell, "Call me Zell. Mr. Boswell was my father. I came here on the account of wanting to do something diffrent with my life. You see, Your Majesty, my family were merchants from Lindblum. They were killed in a raid on the road, though."

Dagger showed a very sympathetic look, "I'm so very sad to hear that. I apologize for such a traumatic event." Zidane frowned behind his helmet mask. Her common folk talk had completely evaporated it seemed. She had that royal tone again. Not that he minded it, he enjoyed the lose jaw of Dagger. "Terrible things have been happening in Gaia recently, it seems." She placed her hands behind her back and strolled around a bit. "How long has it been?" She looked back over her shoulder at him, with that breath taking face. That very face he was so madly in love with.

"Four years." He quickly replied.

"I see." She sighed, "I assume you miss them very much?" Zidane let out a stiff nod and a 'mhm'. What she said next, surprised Zidane. "With all the problems in the world, you think there'd be more answers." Zidane remembered when he said that near four years ago. It was when he was talking to Vivi as Madain Sari. Had Dagger been awake and listening that night?

"That's very profound of you, Your Majesty." Zidane said.

"Yes... well, they are not my own original words." She told him, being so very modest. "Someone I love once said them. And he's right. There are so many problems I wish to fix, but there aren't enough solutions. Like the growing threat of an economic collaspe." Dagger shook her head, "I fear my own funds will not be enough to ensure a bailout of our current standing. Nobody is spending enough."

"I see." Was all Zidane could think of to say.

"I apologize for burdening my own troubles on you." Dagger now turned towards him, "For some reason I trust you very deeply." Her cheeks turned rosy. It made Zidane's heart thud. How he met those warm rosy cheeks. How he missed Dagger embarrassing herself.

"It's an honour, Your Majesty." Zidane said, falling to a kneel, placing his hand on his chest, and looking up at her, though she was sure he couldn't see her eyes. "I shall hereby do my best to protect you." She looked shocked. And that's when it hit Zidane.

_"I shall hereby do my best to kidnap you." _

Zidane quickly scrambled to his feet, "It was nice meeting you, Your Majesty."

Dagger quickly touched her cheek, trying to compose herself, "Yes. Yes, that goes double, Zell." She turned away from him taking in a deep breath. "You... you are dismissed." She stuttered. Zidane sadly look at the back of her head.

"Yes, Your Majesty." He finally said. Zidane stared at her for moments longer, pleading for her to turn around and look him in the eyes. But when it was clear she wasn't, he turned and left. Once on the outside of the door, he fell against it with a groan. "You're so stupid!" He muttered, pulling his helmet off and fingering through his hair.

"How did it go?" Beatrix asked.

"Horrible." Zidane growled, "I think I acted a little too much like myself." Beatrix looked at him sadly. "Stop it. I'll get it down eventually. I was a thief. I'm the master of deception." And with that he stormed away.

Beatrix entered the throne room to see Dagger collasped to her knees, her shoulders falling up and down, "Your Majesty?!" Beatrix gasped, slamming the door and racing to her aid. She knelt beside, "Your Majesty!" She said, breathless, "What it is? What's wrong?!"

"Beatrix," Dagger looked up at her with watery eyes, "that man reminded me so much of Zidane. It was painful." She sniffled. Beatrix bit her lip, wanting to so badly tell Dagger that it was Zidane. That it was the love of her life. But Zidane said it wasn't safe. And it was Beatrix's sworn duty to protect the Queen at all costs. Even if it meant leaving her heart broken and unaware.

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty." Beatrix finally said, "But you're going to have to get over Zidane eventually. He isn't coming back." Those words made Dagger croak up and put her face into Beatrix's shoulder.

...

Zidane lay in his bed in the barracks, lights out. The other guards snored and hummed away in bed, but too much was running through Zidane's head. He pulled the quilt up to his chin and thought lovingly of Dagger. And thought of how much him as Zell upset her. _You can't do that kind of stuff. _Zidane told himself, staring at the bare wall. _Not only is it dangerous to drop hints like that but it will just make it harder for her to get over you. _Zidane paused, _it won't be dangerous forever, though... do you really want her to get over you. What if one day it is safe, but you can't help her because she finally accepted the fact you were 'dead' and had moved onto another man. _Zidane shook the thought away, _a man who is better than you. _That was the exact thought Zidane was trying to avoid thinking. He let out a long breath and closed his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

They were awaken at five-thirty. Zidane sat up, completely tired and used up feeling. He had gotten sleep, but it was one of those light sleeps where you weren't sure if you were resting or just playing scenes in your mind that acted as a dream. He swung his legs over the side of his bed and ruffled his brown hair. When his wrist ran against his cheek, he paused. He then touched it lightly with his fingers. His cheeks were damp. As if he had cried.

Zidane pulled his armour and followed the other guards outside for stretching and a morning jog through the extremely large garden. Zidane kept at the front, enjoying the running. Running always made him feel better. He did it a lot as a teenager. If he was stressed, he went out for either a jog or run, but always ended up being a full on run. Which is what he was doing and he was extremely far ahead of the group. The others seemed to be heaving, having trouble keeping up a jogging rate.

Once they made it back to the barracks, the soldiers praised Zidane for his fantastic endurance. Zidane then realized they had to patrol all day, which sounded so incredibly boring. Zidane checked the schedule. He was posted in the Throne Room until lunch at one, and then he patrolled the garden. He would be with Dagger for the next few hours. He felt his stomach twist a little, but put his sword in his holster and grabbed a rounded shield. He saluted to Haagen and made his way to the throne room.

It was empty when he made it there, but affairs in the throne room began within the hour. He stood guard beside the door, wondering what to expect during the daily schedule of a soldier. He enjoyed the silence and enjoyed being alone. It allowed his mind to wander to his Kuja situation. The bastard probably wasn't dead, which made him so angry. Zidane thought of the scar that ran across the left part of his chest. It was from the Iifa Tree no doubt. Until Zidane could get in contact with Mikoto it wasn't safe. And he had a feeling he was going to have to find the portal to Bran Bal again, if Kuja or Garland hadn't disconnected it or destroyed it. That would mean to go on another journey. By himself. Again.

Zidane didn't think he'd be able to do that again. When he was traveling with the group, he never thought how fortunate he was to have a group of friends with him. But on his way back to Alexandria he thought of how quiet it was. There was no Eiko asking questions. No Dagger commenting on how beautiful the landscape was. No Vivi talking about the different things his grandfather told him about. No Steiner constantly bickering about safety. Just no one. And it was extremely painful.

The door opening drew him from his thoughts. He looked to the right and had the breath knocked out of him again. Dagger was standing there, looking refreshed and ready for the new day. Zidane immediately saluted to her.

"Good morning, Zell." Dagger said with the nod of a head.

"Your Majesty." Zidane said in his fake voice.

Dagger's heels clacked against the marble and echoed through the hall as she made her way to the throne. She walked differently it seemed to Zidane. Her hips were a little bit bigger than last time, which was understandable. Her body most definitely matured more from when she was sixteen. She would be turning twenty soon. However, when she walked, her hips seemed to sway more, which made Zidane feel slightly warm in his armour.

"Zell." She said from her throne. Her voice commanded him to her side. Quickly he crossed the room to her, saluting as crisply as he could. "Today's going to be a rather long day." She told him, flicking a loose strand of her hair from her face. "Would you mind standing close by as to escort me out of the room on breaks?"

"Y... yes, Your Majesty." Zidane nodded.

"Thank you." She smiled.

Zidane positioned himself near the pillar by the throne. She looked content in asking and it made Zidane's heartbeat pick up. Did she know a little too much? Did Zidane reveal everything yesterday by accident? Was the gig already up? He couldn't ponder too much when suddenly, all at once, people rushed into the throne room. He dictated them into a profile line and asked them to remain quiet until they were before the queen. Some people had ridiculous requests. Such as the castle donating some of it's money to family businesses. To which the queen replied with a heavy heart that the castle was having it's own money problem.

"YOU LYIN' WITCH!" The woman screamed, pointing a dirty index finger at her. Zidane looked bewildered, "MY FAMILY IS STARVIN' WHILE YOU'RE SITTIN' UP HERE EATIN' FAT!" Dagger looked shocked. "THE CASTLE DOESN'T HAVE ANY PROBLEMS! YOU'RE JUST LETTING THE ECONOMY COLLASPE! YOU CRUDDY QUEEN, FULL OF RUBBISH!" At this point, Zidane was rushing to the lady to escort her out. "GET YOUR BLOODY HANDS OFF OF ME!" She screamed, giving Zidane a shove. By now other guards had entered the room and were asking the line to leave, which caused much groaning. Zidane picked the lady up, who was `struggling. She gave a good whack to Zidane's head, knocking his helmet off, making his heart thud to a stop. He couldn't turn around now. Dagger would see his face. He was glad his hair was brown and cut short. Steiner appeared in the door way and gasped in horror. He took the angry woman from his arms, passing him to Laudo and Dojebon, who hastily removed the woman from the throne room.

"Zell, are you alright?" Dagger asked, coming down the staircase for him. Steiner watched from the door well. Zidane had a bruise on his left cheek bone, but he remained still, praying for Dagger to get no closer. But still kept coming. "Zell?"

"I'm... I'm fine." Zidane quickly brought his hand to his face, "Um. But my, uh, nose is bleeding. Your Majesty, could you hand my helmet. I do not want you to see the blood." Dagger picked the helmet up and furrowed her brow at the outstretched hand for his helmet, still facing away from her.

"I can take a little blood." Dagger told him. "Now please, let me make sure it's not broken." Dagger placed her hand on his shoulder, turning him.

"Not necessary!" Steiner bellowed, stopping Dagger. "I will take soldier Boswell to his quarters and check from there!" Steiner quickly collected the helmet from her. "Thank you, Your Majesty. Do you need anything?"

"No." Dagger shook her head, "I would like to help assist Zell, though."

"Nonsense. It's close to lunch time, Your Majesty." Steiner told her, shoving Zidane's helmet into his hand. "Oh look, the blood stopped! You can put your helmet back on, Boswell!"

"Will do, Boss!" Zidane replied, sliding the helmet on. Steiner and him immediately tensed though. Dagger stared wide eyed at the back of Zidane. "Cap... Captain." Zidane muttered his correction. With his helmet on, he turned towards the flabberghasted queen.

"Did you... call him... _Boss_?" Dagger asked, grasping a lace hankey in her hands.

"No." Zidane caught himself, "Well, I did. You see... I used to... um, work on a fishing boat. We called our captain boss. It was informal business. Please forgive me, Cap'n!" Zidane turned to Steiner.

"I'll let it slide this time." Steiner told him, "But next time, Boswell, it will be a demerit! Okay?"

"Yes, B... Cap'n!" Zidane saluted. "Your Majesty." He bowed slightly and began for the door.

"Oh, Zell." Dagger called after him. He turned to her saluting. "Could you... escort me to Zidane's memorial?" Steiner's face lost all colour and Zidane instantly knew why. Dagger never let anybody escort her to or from the memorial. She liked to be alone in these times. However, what she said next relaxed him bit, "I've never told any of the guards about the memorial. I suppose I can start with you." She let off a gentle smile.

"Y... yes, Your Majesty." Zidane complied.

"Let us depart." Dagger nodded, "Good day, Steiner." She lead Zidane out of the room, leaving a flabberghasted Steiner with numb arms.

"Y... Your Majesty..." Steiner muttered, his eyes as wide as saucers.

...

There was a grave stone with 'ZIDANE TRIBAL' carved into it. Below it, it read, 'A TRUE LEADER. A GREAT MAN. WILL BE MISSED TRULY. HERO OF ALEXANDRIA.' Zidane was touched to see he was the hero of Alexandria. The tombstone was surrounded by colourful flowers. It seemed to bring peace to Dagger who gently carressed a flower, then looked to the crystal blue sky.

"I like it here." She told Zidane softly. She smiled at the tomb, "It's like he's here, right now." Zidane's heart thudded in his chest. How dearly he wanted to tell Dagger his true identity. "Tell me, what do you know of Zidane Tribal?" She asked.

"Um." Zidane rubbed the back of his head, "I just learned he was the Hero of Alexandria." He told her, then turned towards her. "Were you close with him?"

Dagger nodded, "Oh yes. I was very close to him." Her eyes trailed away, "You could even say I was madly in love with him." Zidane began trembling in his armour. "I do not know why I let him stay behind." Dagger now looked at him... or atleast what she could see of him. "Have you ever let someone you love do something even though you think it's a bad idea." Zidane nodded, thinking of several instances he's had with Dagger. Like giving her the sleeping weed when she said she had sleeping problems. "I let Zidane stay back at the Iifa Tree. That's a large tree on another continent. It's full of all sorts of creatures." She explained, "Anyway. His brother, who had been trying to kill him, got left behind in the tree, and he said he had to go back in. That he felt wrong leaving him behind." Dagger dabbed her eyes with the hankerchief she had been carrying, "And I let him, though I'm fairly certain his brother just killed him when he found him." The tears began just flying down her cheeks, "I apologize. I am rambling."

"No, no." Zidane shook his head. "I'm very sad to hear that, Your Majesty." She let out a small whimper. And without thinking, Zidane pulled her into his arms like he used to do. It was like on command when she cried, Zidane made sure he comforted her. He ran his fingers through her hair, "Everything is gonna be alright." Zidane said, his Zell-personality melting away. "I'll be damned if you're gonna hurt anymore." Everything felt perfect for Zidane. He was taking in her scent that he missed so dearly. Her body fit so perfectly against his, like their bodies were carved for each other. How he ached to feel her against him again. But the moment ended too soon when Dagger backed away from him.

"What...?" She whispered. And that's when Zidane realized that's what he always said to Dagger when she was hurt or upset. "How... how did you know he said that to me?" Her brown eyes were shimmering.

"Um," Zidane adjusted his helmet on his head, "that's what all guys say to upset girls. It usually makes them feel better." He offered. Dagger looked at Zidane's tombstone and then back at him.

"You're odd, Zell." She whispered. Slowly Dagger approached him, "I feel like I've known you forever." She told him. "Like we're connected somehow. And it is crazy... because I've only known you for a day." Zidane didn't know how to reply. "Isn't that odd?"

"Yeah." Zidane replied after a moment. "It is."

"Thank you for coming with me today." Dagger said and turned to leave. "Good day."

After she left, Zidane mumbled, "Good day, Dagger..."

...

"Yo! Zell!" Blutzen appeared by him at dinner. "I heard the Queen asked you to escort her to that guy's memorial." He climbed onto the bench beside Zidane, grabbing himself a slice of bread and cheese.

"Yeah." Zidane said behind a mouthful. "So?"

"That's like, _major_." Weimar said from across the table. "Since when does the queen of Alexandria have time for the knights?"

"She's very appreciative of her guard staff." Zidane told them.

"What's she like?" Weimar asked, disreguarding Zidane's previous comment.

"She's beautiful, right?" Blutzen chimed in.

"Of course she's beautiful!" Weimar said, chugging some of his ale, "Don't ask stupid questions! So, Zell! Tell us about the Queen."

"What is there to tell?" Zidane asked, furrowing his brow.

"Who's that guy she's hung up on."

"Uh, his name is Zidane Tribal." Zidane said, feeling odd about doing so.

"Who is he?"

"Just... some guy." Zidane shrugged.

"Does she get emotional about him?" Weimar asked, "It's been four years."

"Yeah." Zidane nodded, "She's really in love with him."

"Weird." Blutzen shrugged, "None of those suitors have won her heart."

"Suitors?" Zidane's brow furrowed.

"Yeah. Men deemed worthy enough to flirt with the Queen are sent to the castle for a night with the queen." Blutzen explained, "So far, she's declined every man who's waltzed through those doors. I haven't seen a suitor come to the castle in the past week." He sighed, "I sure wish I was worthy enough for the queen for one night. I'd show her I'm way more man than that Zidane fellow ever was." He nudged Zell, "Am I right?" He chuckled.

"Yeah..." Zidane muttered, wanting to so desperately tell him he was Zidane.

"Oh shut up, Blutzen." Weimar rolled his eyes, "You couldn't woo her." Weimar now looked at Zidane, "However, you, Zell, may be onto something with the queen." Zidane's cheeks flushed a little pink.

"You may get to take the queen to bed. You lucky bastard!"

"Uh... yeah." Zidane stood. "I'll be right back guys."

...

Zidane slid his helmet on even though he was just going to Steiner's barracks opposite of the soldiers barracks. Better safe than sorry, though. His tail was thumping against the inside of his armour as he shut the door and began a fast walk to Steiner's barracks. He was almost there when,

"Good evening, Zell." He came to an almost screeching stop to turn and see Dagger out for her evening walk. She was smiling widely, "Why are you not relaxing? Is everything alright?"

"Oh." Zidane cleared his throat, "Yes. Yes. Everything is fine."

"Would you like to join me on my walk then?"

Zidane sighed very quietly and glanced over his shoulder at Steiner's barracks. He really needed to talk to him about the suitors situation, but taking a stroll with Dagger sounded amazing. He nodded and agreed and they began on their way. From the window of the Knights of Pluto barracks, Weimar and Blutzen stood shocked.

"How does he do it?" Weimar whispered.

"Lucky bastard!" Blutzen cursed, banging his fist against the window.

The walk was quiet. Zidane looked to the sky at the clashing of all colours. The yellows. The oranges. The pinks. The purples. The blues. It was all really beautiful and breath taking. He watched the doves and birds fly freely about, ruffling their feathers in the very cool and casual breeze. Dagger looked at the flowers as she passed. Something that would of bored Zidane very quickly. She walked with her hands clasped infront, her hair in it's old style of the clip near the end of the hair. He couldn't decide if he liked it that way or in the braid.

"Zell," Dagger said once she was sure the silence had gone on for too long. "Have you ever been in love?" The question threw Zidane off.

"Your Majesty?"

"Have you?" She asked again, her hair getting carried into the wind.

"Yes." Zidane nodded.

"Who was it with?"

"A girl that was perfect for me..." Zidane replied, his voice low.

"W... what happened?" Dagger asked.

"I disappeared from her life." Zidane stopped walking. "I left. I told her to go on without me. I had unfinished business else where that didn't concern her. I made her leave." Zidane said. He shook his head, "I wish I had listened to her."

"Do you still love her?" Dagger turned towards him.

"Of course I do." Zidane replied. "I couldn't forget her if I tried." Dagger brought her hand to her lip for a moment, contemplating something. She then nodded. "Do you still love Zidane?"

"Yes." Dagger said, her voice a whisper. Her eyes were full of warm salty tears. "And... I am frightened I will never stop loving him. Even if he's gone, it feels like he's still with me. I miss him so much it hurts. It's funny. The very first time I met him, I thought he was obnoxious. Like he would not be able to help me. But as time continued, I saw the beauty of his character. He was perfect. Dazzling. He made me so dizzy and happy. And then he had to go away from my life. He had to stay behind to help someone who had constantly done him wrong. He promised me he would return. Zidane was never someone to break a promise. But I feel as if it was something that had to be broken." She sniffled, "Please forgive me. I am rambling."

"So, you really love this guy, huh?"

"More than anything I have ever loved in my entire life. More than any parent or caregiver I have ever had. More than any book that has been in my hands. More than any precious gem. More than anything. I swear it. I would give away my position as Queen of Alexandria just to be with him." Zidane was shocked to hear this. He placed his hands on his helmet.

_I can't hide from her. Even if it is dangerous... it's killing her. _

"Soldier Boswell!" Came Steiner's booming voice, frightening both of them. "I have been looking for you! Knights of Pluto meeting in my barracks! Get running, Soldier!"

"Right, Cap'n!" Zidane saluted. "Good evening, Your Majesty."

"Goodbye, Zell." She waved slightly, and turned back for the castle. Zidane and Steiner rounded the hedges for the Steiner's barracks.

"Were you really about to remove your helmet for her?" Steiner asked.

"You missed what she had just said," Zidane said, sliding the helmet off his head. "It's killing her, Steiner. I either need to stay away from her, or tell her. She's tied up on the fact that I'm dead. You either need to cut her lose or let me tell her."

"It's your decision if you want to tell her." Steiner replied, "You just said it wasn't safe."

"I know." Zidane nodded, fingering through his brown hair, "I need to contact Mikoto."

"How will you do that?"

"I need you to get Dagger's pendant."

"Why?"

"The crystal is just big enough to channel to the other crystals on her clothing. I'll go there tonight. When the other soldiers ask about my disappearence, tell them a story of where I had to go."

"Right." Steiner nodded, opening the door to his barracks to the awaiting team.


End file.
